Thursday, March 26, 2009

The Do s and Don't s of Sidewalk Counselling

The Do s and Don't s of Sidewalk Counselling

Saturday, 3/21, around 10am, Officer Becker stopped by to say the police received calls that we were harassing people at Womanuncare. He went on to say that, "you should not look at them, talk or shout to or at them, or try to interact with them". In retort, I told him that we sign a statement that we would not harass or act violently toward any of the clients. And I told him that we "give them a greeting, we offer them literature, we ask them if they would like free ultrasounds and counselling and to give their babies up for adoption?" If they want to interact with us, we will do that. If they don't want to, we stop talking to them, but we continue to pray for them, that they will give their babies life.

Now here's the rest of the story: the couple that filed the complaint had taken a lady friend inside for an abortion. They first parked in the parking lot by Sfield Rd. Someone tried to engage them in conversation. They hurled at us a mouth full of insults, going into and coming out of the mill. As they got into their truck, they dropped their cell phone. Then they roared off. But five minutes later, they return and drive up to the abortion mills front door. Someone gave me the phone so I called out to the cussing lady as she went into the mill, "Is this your cell phone?" She took some steps inside the door, but turned around and headed toward me. She said, "Yah, that's my phone, how did you get it?" I just had to be a smart #@$%! so I said, "I'll return it, if you change your mind and don't get an abortion". The woman said, @#$%! to me. I was speechless.
As they backed out, they ran into another car that was also backing out of a parking space. Minor damage was done. But guess who they wanted to blame for the accident? You guessed right: me. I was reported to the police as the cause and harasser of those nice folks. So you see folks as long as I'm around, you can do anything and I'll get the blame.
So all of that takes me to the meeting on procedures we had last week at the Problem Pregnancy office to make sure we were all on the same page with our approach as sidewalk counsellors.
We decided to follow the Helpers of God's Precious Infants techniques.
There are five things we say initially:
Greeting: Smile. Look into her eyes, say:
Hi mom, God bless you.
My name is _________.
I'm here on behalf of pro-life.
Here take this: (give a rosary or some prolife literature to get her to slow down)

Empathy: As the woman walks to the abortion door, say:

Many woman going in have real problems, We understand that.

Warning:
If you take the baby out, its like ice water for a fever. The fever goes down for five minutes, but comes right back.
The same things happen to you. The problems will appear to go away, but will come right back. But in this case , thousands of times worse.
We have free help for you throughout your pregnancy (show the literature).
Help Available: ( If the woman hesitates)
Describe the help available at the centers close by ( show literature ):
Free pregnancy tests, counselling, ultrasounds, even free medical help can be arranged in many cases.
Something Spiritual: Always end with:
We are praying hard that you will continue to give your baby life or Please, Have Mercy on Your Baby.

Lastly, when interacting with clients do so without shouting at them.

Feed back, welcome.
Peace of Christ.
Howard

3 comments:

  1. Good blog Howard... Keep up the good work.

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  2. Hi Howard,
    Something I'd add as a way of comment ( from Monsignor Reilly, the founder of the Helpers of God's Precious Infants) is that we want to remain in deep prayer while we are 'on the sidewalk'. If we are there to sidewalk counsel or there to pray, we want to remain in deep prayer. Keep our conversations to a minimum, and then only those things that are necessary for the work we are called to do while there.
    One of our prayers is that we will respond with love (as opposed to sarcasm or argument or such) to whatever insults or slights we receive while there.
    Our job is to deliver a message of hope and help. We must remember who we are representing when we step onto that sidewalk.
    God Bless you for the work you are doing,
    -Mike Stack MEV

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  3. Good point for all of us to remember. Often it is so nice to meet others that have our same values, we forget and get carried away. So let us remind each other in charity and love.

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